Rules of the road
Many people really don't want to read the whole rules of the road book in order to pass their driving test. I mean who has time to skim over 30 pages of pictures and text? NOT ME! Well I've devised a more abstract and slimmer version of "Rules of the road."
1. When on the expressway, merge all the way to the left lane. Go the speed limit. It is actually prefferable to go under the speed limit, your choice. Make sure that one of the blinkers is on without intention of switching lanes. No matter how many honks, high beams, or middle fingers you encounter, do not, I reapeat, DO NOT, increase speed or switch lanes. It also helps to be on your cell phone and/or to read a novel while in this situation.
2. On a two lane highway, always go 10 miles under the speed limit. The cars behind you are in no hurry at all, no matter how their face expressions look like in your rear view mirror. Actually, you shouldn't even be looking in your rear view mirror. You're not driving backwards are you? Exactly! As the two lane highway expands into more lanes the best thing to do in that situation is to slam on your car's brakes. By doing this you are performing a random brake check to make sure your brakes are still working. It also will alert the drivers behind you. Nothing wakes a person up more than a car in front of them slamming on their brakes.
3. Seating and mirror positions: The key to adjusting yourself and your car seat is to have minimal visibility and functionality. The seat should be pushed and reclined all the way back, no matter your height. The mirrors should be randomly adjusted. It is best to adjust them so you can see yourself in them, because they serve no other purpose. Position yourself so that you are sitting in the driver's seat while leaning towards the center of your car. You are only required to keep one hand on the top of the steering wheel. The other hand is strictly used for, but not limited to: eating, drinking, smoking, radio adjusting, talkin on the cell phone, reaching for the CDs on the floor and in the back seat, doing your makeup (male and female), brushing your teeth, and shaving (male and female).
That is all you need to know now. Stick around for part two of Rules of the road.
1. When on the expressway, merge all the way to the left lane. Go the speed limit. It is actually prefferable to go under the speed limit, your choice. Make sure that one of the blinkers is on without intention of switching lanes. No matter how many honks, high beams, or middle fingers you encounter, do not, I reapeat, DO NOT, increase speed or switch lanes. It also helps to be on your cell phone and/or to read a novel while in this situation.
2. On a two lane highway, always go 10 miles under the speed limit. The cars behind you are in no hurry at all, no matter how their face expressions look like in your rear view mirror. Actually, you shouldn't even be looking in your rear view mirror. You're not driving backwards are you? Exactly! As the two lane highway expands into more lanes the best thing to do in that situation is to slam on your car's brakes. By doing this you are performing a random brake check to make sure your brakes are still working. It also will alert the drivers behind you. Nothing wakes a person up more than a car in front of them slamming on their brakes.
3. Seating and mirror positions: The key to adjusting yourself and your car seat is to have minimal visibility and functionality. The seat should be pushed and reclined all the way back, no matter your height. The mirrors should be randomly adjusted. It is best to adjust them so you can see yourself in them, because they serve no other purpose. Position yourself so that you are sitting in the driver's seat while leaning towards the center of your car. You are only required to keep one hand on the top of the steering wheel. The other hand is strictly used for, but not limited to: eating, drinking, smoking, radio adjusting, talkin on the cell phone, reaching for the CDs on the floor and in the back seat, doing your makeup (male and female), brushing your teeth, and shaving (male and female).
That is all you need to know now. Stick around for part two of Rules of the road.
posted by Haris at 2:39 PM
1 Comments:
nice tunes!!!Bradsblog
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